[click image]This could mean war.
I'll be back to rant about it in fits and snatches in a little while.
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I was a tomboy. I am a tomboy. And I have never had a homosexual impulse in my entire life. While titillating, even dreams with homosexual overtones turn me off, always so horrific to me, even in my sleep, that they wake me up every time, not that I have them very often, thank goodness. The only dream I ever had of sex with a woman that did not wake me up instanter as a nightmare was one in which I was a man.
Not me acting like a man, or looking like one, but being one. Being a male. An actor in real life, actually, whose performance in a certain series of episodes on tv had intrigued me. I was him in that dream, a darn good-looking and soulful man of about 35 who proceeded to pull a nonagenarian ballerina from her closeted nearness to death and make love to her. She turned young and vital again because I -- a man -- made love to her in that dream. I have to say I think I was only about 30 at the time of that dream, so it wasn't about aging, and I was the object of a couple dozen men's active lust at the time, too, and right in the middle of a long mad love affair with a seriously attractive country boy, so I don't think it was about any question of my sexuality or gender identity. Indeed, it was about awakening something ancient and neglected inside and it was completely wonderful.
Notwithstanding the many gays I am and have been close to in my life, it has always driven me nuts how they try to juke up ways to make it seem more natural. I'm not even saying it's unnatural. I'm saying I don't hold with them twisting stuff as part of their lifelong fight for acceptability.... Understandable as that is, and it is... it's still wrong. It's still fake. It's still delusion. It's still pernicious. For everyone. Them included. AND TOMBOYS ESPECIALLY!
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My little sister and I, even with our mother trying to make us into replicas of Shirley Temple, were maniacal nature nuts from the git. We were into pollywogs and amphibians of every stripe from the earliest we were set loose even a little. I used to catch a bluebelly lizard on the way to school, ride him on my shoulder as I walked and set him loose again before entering class. Before we got horses, we had to be dragged home from "creek walking" and sliding down the grassy slopes behind our house on pieces of cardboard. It started by the time I was four and my sister two, just at the end of the block where there was a nearly completely silted in marsh and lots and lots and lots of frogs. By the time we were five and three, there was outright no stopping us, and Barbie dolls, any dolls, were just fine, but didn't hold our attention for long. We wore jeans and desert boots or sneakers at all times not forced into dresses. I always tended more toward natural drab colors and she toward anything pastel. She ended up much more attracted to the frilly than I ever would be even in a dream, but no slouch in the so called masculine pursuits and attitudes either... while going through the agonies of boyfriends' perfidies just like the rest of us.
So the thought that lesbians are trying to lay claim to our successor tomboys is really making me mad.
We were never indoors unless forced. We rode our horses all over Marin County. We stopped for snacks by creeks and waded in to catch newts or frogs, just to stroke them or kiss them, before pressing on. Nobody, not even our fussiest frilly friends, ever thought us odd, or different, or not girlish, or someone to watch for signs of attraction to the same sex.
Balderdash! Oh! This world has gone insane through and through! From top to bottom. From left to right. What the hell is wrong with being sensible and genuine and just naturally being instead of all this stupefyingly ridiculous abuse?
My youngest daughter is a Tomboy indeed. She was always out playing with the neighbor boys, running and chasing, tackling and wrestling. She even gave herself a boys name and had all the boys fooled that she was a boy.
ReplyDeleteThen one day, when she was beginning to develop, one of the neighbor boys asked my wife if she was really a boy. My wife told him that she was a girl, but wished she was a boy.
When my daughter found out she was crushed - "I won't be able to wrestle anymore!"
Every now and then she gets together with one of her girl friends and gets all dolled up, puts on a dress, does her hair and then I can't even recognize her! But the rest of the time it's jeans and sweatshirts.
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Have you and your wife, or friends and family, had any concerns she may be, or become, a lesbian? We weren't into roughhousing but we always hung with boys, me especially. It was hard for me to deal with my buddies' wives and girlfriends after we grew up because so many of them doubted our connection was purely childhood friendship. That hurt because, of course, the guys would always pull away then, having to choose. But, even so, what the heck is wrong with everybody?
ReplyDeletehad any concerns she may be, or become, a lesbian
ReplyDeleteNo, not at all. Quite the opposite, we try to reign her in from chasing the boys. So far her choices have all been assholes - get her falling for them then dump her.
Assholes?
ReplyDeleteNow you tell me. Sheesh. I always thought you called those types "male".... Of course, the really sexy part about assholes is that they are not afraid of you, so it's bound to remain problematic!