oh, how ridiculously odd

[click image]

I was on a luxury liner for its maiden voyage. I'm not sure if we ever left the dock. It wasn't your average luxury liner. No. It was a spa liner. Each passenger had what amounted to an entire home onboard. There were these new-fangled sauna/steam beds that didn't involve going into some airless little cubicle or suffering with a group of strangers. There were Jewish Princesses running around everywhere. Extremely annoying, except I wasn't bothering to be annoyed, just sort of took in their activities and yimmering together, watched one ardently scraping her friend, ripe for major exfoliation, on a sauna bed, and then retired to my own. There, suddenly, was a naked celebrity. One Ashton Kutcher of much too young for Demi Moore fame, and, well, probably, underwear ads. But he was naked, let there be not one particle of a doubt because his large, outright handsome, dick was mildly humidly dangling very close to my face. I had to ask him to leave.