i couldn't talk about it until today

Yesterday morning I was awakened from an extremely vivid dream. The human beer keg fat passive aggressive from back home had lost a lot of weight, grown back a bunch of hair and gotten back with some long-lost wife who was young and sweet. This by itself was shocking enough, let me tell you, but the dream had started out with me driving back there by a secret route, one that starts very far away and lets me visit without seeming to have gone there... gone back where my cells can't be told apart from the trees.

There was a disgruntled lesbian couple staying in my cabin that somehow had turned into a motel room. I told them I was just there to retrieve something left behind, grabbed it and then hightailed it to the old neighbor's place, where I found him in this incredibly improved condition. He and his young wife were ridiculously glad to see me, extremely hospitable, as scandalized by the moteltude of my former residence in paradise, and I just couldn't process the positive presentation of someone for whom I have zero respect and am quite glad to be quit of. It was getting to be too much and I was resolving to get back out through the trees to my car, taking my leave, when they blurted out that the recently deceased owner of the property had stipulated in his will that I be in charge of it.... A deathbed apology for grievous mistreatment.

I snapped awake so fast and so crisply it's not feasible to describe it. And the pain presents a similar problem. It was too real, too vivid, too close, too full of truth and evil. I'm trying very hard to settle down enough to see what that dream was telling me and if it was telling me what I think it was telling me, I don't know what to do.